Excerpt from BONDED :

~~

 

We stood outside the detention cell, listening to the harsh, wheezing breath of the man inside.  The walls were cold stone, this deep within the household: thick and damp with stale condensation.  I had been here many times to deal with prisoners, and yet I had never been more reluctant to be here in my life.

“Oriel, I don’t want you to do this.”

He looked up at me, eyes clouded with worry, though he tried to look brave.  “Chariz… sir.  It’s no worse than I’ve done before: than has been done to me before.”  He looked younger than he had in the daylight—smaller somehow, and more vulnerable.  He glanced over to where my mother stood with her pathetic Magician and a selection of her grooms, chosen for their companionship of muscle rather than mentality. “I will be glad to help the Lady.”

I felt sick in my stomach: I had never felt fear like this before.   I could not describe what it was, nor identify why it struck me so keenly.  It should have shamed me, and it was important to me that I kept face in front of the Lady.  Oriel had only to be near the prisoner, to try to find out from his intentions whether he was friend or foe.  That was all.  Then I would take him away from here, whatever insults she might use on me, and go back to my room and I would bathe him in the scented water, feed him the latest fruits until he laughed and protested he’d had enough and juice dribbled from the corners of his mouth, and then roll him naked on my bed until his skin was flushed with need and his legs stretched up to my shoulders…

Oriel smiled slightly and blushed: I wondered if he could feel the desire that swamped me.  He touched me once on the arm, very lightly, and then he went to stand beside the grooms to be let into the cell.  We would watch him from the safety of the viewing area outside, a small walled platform from where we could see through the high window of the cell.  I stood next to my mother though my body shrank away from her.  She knew I disapproved of this whole investigation.  The Magician waved the grooms and Oriel through to the cell, the door closing solidly behind them, the wooden frame shuddering against the force.  They locked it, too, though I didn’t imagine there was any physical threat from the silver merchants’ man.  I could see him through the window, laid out on a pallet set against the far wall.  He looked as if he were ill, for he didn’t stand up, even when the grooms announced their authorisation from the Lady.  His face was a sallow, shadowed colour which was surely not entirely due to the dank decorations of his new guest quarters.

The Magician waved again at the grooms through the window, and they pushed Oriel down on to a chair beside the pallet.  He sat without a complaint.  One of the grooms let his hand linger too long on Oriel’s shoulder, kneading the flesh as if he measured him for market--I marked that man at once, for future attention.  Then they stepped back against the wall, out of our sight.  Oriel stretched out one of his slim, graceful hands and rested it on the prisoner’s arm. 

That was all he did.

My stomach lurched. I didn’t know how it could happen, for I wasn’t touching Oriel or even in the same room, but I felt my heartbeat skip gently and re-settle in a different beat―one that I knew with certainty was Oriel’s. It was slower than mine, and made my muscles loosen and relax, just like they did when he hugged me for no particular reason; just like they did when I’d slip into the bath alongside him, spilling water on my rugs and making him laugh and complain in equal measures; just like they did when he sang quietly―and unfortunately quite tunelessly―in my ear at night. Just like they did whenever I was with him.

And then he sat bolt upright. His head went back and his back bowed awkwardly. My heartbeat started to race and my hands clenched at my sides.